Sunday, November 25, 2012

NFL Picks - Week 12



Week 11 Results (10-3) – Overall (100-48-1)

Incredibly short this week; just got back into town.  Reached the 100 win mark last week and could have eclipsed it if I hadn’t gone for the upset reaches with Philly and Chicago.  On to the next one…


Vikings @ Bears
Jay Cutler is playing, and the Bears defense has to be pissed off after last week’s flop in San Francisco.

Raiders @ Bengals
AJ Green should have a field day against the Raiders secondary.  Bengals win their third straight.

Steelers @ Browns
Maybe I’m getting suckered into this one, but Cleveland has played everyone close this year and get the Steelers and their third string QB at home.  Pittsburgh’s game plan is no secret – run game and defense.  Trent Richardson has been fed over and over the past three weeks and responded tremendously.  I’ll put my faith in the rookie.  Having Joe Haden active seals it for me.

Bills @ Colts
Buffalo has shown up two weeks in a row.  Make it three as they pull off the upset in Indy.

Broncos @ Chiefs
They’ll miss Willis McGahee, but Peyton Manning should have little trouble beating a team that has absolutely nothing to play for.

Seahawks @ Dolphins
Miami is reeling with three straight losses and get the smashmouth Seahawks at home.  Each of Seattle’s five road games has been decided by seven points or less.  Expect no different in this one.  Seattle wins 17-13. 

Falcons @ Bucs
This one looks like the shootout of the week to me.  I love the way this Tampa team is playing, and the Falcons have a couple more losses in them.  I think we see one this week.

Titans @ Jaguars
Chad Henne is now the QB of the Jags after shining last week against the Texans.  The Jags are still one of the two or three worst teams in the league, and Chris Johnson is playing at a high level again.  It’s ugly, but the Titans get the win.

Ravens @ Chargers
Trap game of the week.  The Ravens travel to San Diego in between games against the Steelers.  Baltimore is clearly the better team, but if Philip Rivers hasn’t given up on the season after last week’s loss, I think they squeak by the Ravens today. 

49ers @ Saints
Let the Colin Kaepernick era begin.  The Niners new starter rolls into New Orleans looking to knock off the resurgent Saints.  This could be the most entertaining game of the week.  San Francisco clearly has the better defense, and great ones travel well.  This new look offense may not yet rival Drew Brees’ attack, but they’re going to be a dangerous force with Kaepernick under center. 

Rams @ Cardinals
Defense defense defense.  The Cardinals break their six game losing streak on the back of their defense.  New starting QB Ryan Lindley eliminates the big mistakes, and the Cardinals win a low scoring game at home.

Packers @ Giants
Eli and the Giants are struggling and get the under-the-radar Packers at home on SNF.  Green Bay has won five in a row and are quietly back on top in the NFC North.  Randall Cobb has a huge game as the Packers keep the Giants on that downward trend.

Panthers @ Eagles
The Eagles are a team that I think have given up on the season, especially with how pitiful they looked last week at Washington.  The writing is on the wall, and it’s in bold italicized print – the Andy Reid era has six games remaining.  Cam Newton has a big game on MNF.


4 comments:

  1. Since you had to rush through these, I decided to keep my remarks brief as well. Ergo, haiku! Some are 3-5-3, which really makes you focus on getting to the point.

    “Vikings @ Bears: Jay Cutler is playing, and the Bears defense has to be pissed off after last week’s flop in San Francisco.”

    Without Jay
    Bears can’t even shit
    In the woods

    “Raiders @ Bengals: AJ Green should have a field day against the Raiders secondary. Bengals win their third straight.”

    Oakland did not start
    This season as the leagues worst
    But man, they are now

    “Steelers @ Browns: Maybe I’m getting suckered into this one, but Cleveland has played everyone close this year and get the Steelers and their third string QB at home. Pittsburgh’s game plan is no secret – run game and defense. Trent Richardson has been fed over and over the past three weeks and responded tremendously. I’ll put my faith in the rookie. Having Joe Haden active seals it for me."

    You had to be a
    Master prognosticator
    To get this one right!

    “Bills @ Colts: Buffalo has shown up two weeks in a row. Make it three as they pull off the upset in Indy.”

    It’s not a secret
    To better two and fourteen
    You just need some Luck


    “Broncos @ Chiefs: They’ll miss Willis McGahee, but Peyton Manning should have little trouble beating a team that has absolutely nothing to play for.”

    (as said by Peyton Manning)

    Sorry, did you say
    We are losing to KC?
    Give me a minute.

    Seahawks @ Dolphins: Miami is reeling with three straight losses and get the smashmouth Seahawks at home. Each of Seattle’s five road games has been decided by seven points or less. Expect no different in this one. Seattle wins 17-13."

    Dear Seahawks Corners:
    Those whistling sounds were hearing
    Were balls thrown past you

    "Falcons @ Bucs: This one looks like the shootout of the week to me. I love the way this Tampa team is playing, and the Falcons have a couple more losses in them. I think we see one this week."

    Bucs showing Raheem
    Lived in Miriana Trench
    Waaaaaay over his head

    “Titans @ Jaguars: Chad Henne is now the QB of the Jags after shining last week against the Texans. The Jags are still one of the two or three worst teams in the league, and Chris Johnson is playing at a high level again. It’s ugly, but the Titans get the win.”

    Henne v. Gabbert
    Is not a controversy
    Henne is better

    ReplyDelete

  2. “Ravens @ Chargers: Trap game of the week. The Ravens travel to San Diego in between games against the Steelers. Baltimore is clearly the better team, but if Philip Rivers hasn’t given up on the season after last week’s loss, I think they squeak by the Ravens today."

    Only a Norv team
    Could see a 4th and thirty
    Become 1st and ten

    “49ers @ Saints: Let the Colin Kaepernick era begin. The Niners new starter rolls into New Orleans looking to knock off the resurgent Saints. This could be the most entertaining game of the week. San Francisco clearly has the better defense, and great ones travel well. This new look offense may not yet rival Drew Brees’ attack, but they’re going to be a dangerous force with Kaepernick under center.”

    (Whenever I say something negative on reflex rather than letting whatever it is play out, it always makes me think of Lucy Liu in Kill Bill 1 when she tells Uma Thurman something like “I regret the unkind comments I made earlier about your skill.” So I say…)

    I regret
    My harsh words about
    Kaepernick

    “Rams @ Cardinals: Defense defense defense. The Cardinals break their six game losing streak on the back of their defense. New starting QB Ryan Lindley eliminates the big mistakes, and the Cardinals win a low scoring game at home.”

    Get him some weapons
    TPE says Sam Bradford
    Can win you 10 games



    “Packers @ Giants: Eli and the Giants are struggling and get the under-the-radar Packers at home on SNF. Green Bay has won five in a row and are quietly back on top in the NFC North. Randall Cobb has a huge game as the Packers keep the Giants on that downward trend.
    (I called NFL Sirius before the season to point out that the Packers would really miss a retiring player this year. I got told they should be ready with who to make a smooth transistion. I was skeptical, and I was right.)

    No one believed me
    When I said that Chad Clifton
    Belonged in Canton


    “Panthers @ Eagles: The Eagles are a team that I think have given up on the season, especially with how pitiful they looked last week at Washington. The writing is on the wall, and it’s in bold italicized print – the Andy Reid era has six games remaining. Cam Newton has a big game on MNF.”

    An Eagles haiku?
    Of course I was gonna write
    Vick, who has herpes!


    I'd like to add these were all done in one take, so some are going to be better than others...but that Jay Cutler one is pretty damn good if I say so myself.

    TPE




    ReplyDelete
  3. “Since you had to rush through these, I decided to keep my remarks brief as well. Ergo, haiku! Some are 3-5-3, which really makes you focus on getting to the point.”

    Never a bad time for a haiku!

    “Without Jay
    Bears can’t even shit
    In the woods”

    Aside from Kaepernick, are there no decent backup QBs in the league? You’re right, the Bears are garbage without Cutler. Seattle isn’t a team you want to be weak against up front, so Cutler better have his head on a swivel Sunday.

    “Oakland did not start
    This season as the leagues worst
    But man, they are now”

    Yeah being a Raiders fan must suck. Carson Palmer is garbage, their star RB can’t ever stay healthy, and Rolando McClain has a-holed himself off the team. Not a lot to get excited about in Oaktown.

    “You had to be a
    Master prognosticator
    To get this one right!”

    Or just count on Charlie Batch being Charlie Batch. The backup QB play this season has been atrocious, and Pittsburgh’s stiffs lead the way in ineptitude.

    “It’s not a secret
    To better two and fourteen
    You just need some Luck”

    Very well done! I like that. That Luck dude certainly has turned things around in Indy. They have yet to lose two games in a row and are still in range of the 10-1 Texans. I’d love to see those week 15 and 17 matchups mean something to both teams.

    “Sorry, did you say
    We are losing to KC?
    Give me a minute.”

    That one was too close for comfort. Nice effort by Knowshon Moreno in that one. I’m anxious to see how the Bucs handle the pressure of a big road game this week. Denver can’t bring that KC effort to this one or else the Bucs will steal a win.

    “Dear Seahawks Corners:
    Those whistling sounds were hearing
    Were balls thrown past you”

    Maybe those looming suspensions were on their minds. I really expected a better effort from the Seahawks in that one. You’d think that if Russell Wilson completed passes to 10 different receivers for 224 yards and 2 TDs that would be enough to beat the Dolphins, regardless of where they were playing. But that’s why this is the NFL. Any given Sunday.

    “Bucs showing Raheem
    Lived in Miriana Trench
    Waaaaaay over his head”

    That moron was so unprepared and ill-suited for the Bucs head coach job. Secondary coach should be his ceiling, and the fact that the Redskins rank 31st in the league against the pass might mean that even that is reaching. The fact that the Bucs have had a tremendous turnaround in Schiano’s first year just shows how awful a decision the Glazers made by replacing Gruden with that rodeo clown. Good riddance! Too bad we can’t get those three years back.

    ReplyDelete
  4. “Henne v. Gabbert
    Is not a controversy
    Henne is better”

    And with the way the upcoming draft prospects are looking, Henne might be their best option for next year too. Jacksonville, Kansas City, Oakland, Arizona, and the Jets are among the league’s worst teams and have bad QB situations. How would you like to finally be in position to draft a franchise QB and be left choosing from Geno Smith, Matt Barkley, and Tyler Wilson? I think it’s going to be a weak QB class, so a lot of these bad QB teams are going to stay bad QB teams.

    “Only a Norv team
    Could see a 4th and thirty
    Become 1st and ten”

    Pretty much sums up their season doesn’t it? Snatching defeat from the jaws of victory.

    “I regret
    My harsh words about
    Kaepernick”

    Great movies(s). Kaepernick has been awesome so far. What I find funny is the talk shows going on and on about how the situation was handled and how badly poor Alex Smith is being treated. Boo hoo. All you hear is how this is a tough guy sport and how all these flags are wimping up the game. Ok, but we have to worry about Alex Smith’s feelings now? Hell, the Niners were hot for Peyton Manning and were willing to let Smith sign with Miami. I know most of these guys are just filling air time, but I find the story to be a complete non-story. Kaepernick is the future. The future is now. Let’s move on.

    “Get him some weapons
    TPE says Sam Bradford
    Can win you 10 games”

    How long is this guy’s career going to be stagnated by a lack of receiving weapons? Why waste your money on a franchise QB if you’re not going to give him anyone to throw to?

    “No one believed me
    When I said that Chad Clifton
    Belonged in Canton”

    Right on. That was a piss poor performance from the Packer OL. They were flat out dominated by the Giants for the entirety of that “contest”. At this point I’m just hoping Rodgers doesn’t get seriously hurt back there, because with the way these guys are playing it’s not going to take long for that to happen.

    “An Eagles haiku?
    Of course I was gonna write
    Vick, who has herpes!”

    Ha ha! Gotta have the herpes reference. Talk about quitting. The Eagles might as well not even suit up for the rest of their games. This team is completely lost. Prediction – Andy Reid is signed as the Chargers new HC no later than a week after the Super Bowl.

    “I'd like to add these were all done in one take, so some are going to be better than others...but that Jay Cutler one is pretty damn good if I say so myself.”

    You have quite the 5-7-5 gift! The Bears and Chargers ones were my favorites. Hats off to you my friend!

    ReplyDelete